Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Spell like Spell

Learn to properly spell and use these common words:
  • Receive: What you get; "i" before "e" except after "c"
  • Receipt: Something you receive upon making a purchase or transaction
  • Their/They're/There: There is a difference
  • To/Too/Two: When two are too many
  • Its/It's: It is what it is only when it's not
  • Check/Cheque: Leave your check at the cheque out?
  • Spelt wrong: My point
  • Through/Threw/Thru: Getting to the end
  • Effect/Affect: ionately yours...
A hair salon/spa located on upper Fort Street had a rudimentary sign in their window advertising 'recieving a free' service with the purchase of some type of acrylic nail offering....even if you are not able to practice appropriate everyday word usage and spelling, at least write advertisements and other professional signage in a Word document first so that the computer can act as a surrogate brain and underline or highlight your mistakes in red. Do I really want to be a patron of a business that offers to do things to my body for a lot of money when their advertising is handwritten with mispelled words? PROFESSIONALISM

Monday, September 7, 2009

The Salad Loop

The Salad Loop
  • Located on Government Street. Directions are unnecessary as I would not want to assist anyone in finding this salad 'poop'
  • Offering unsanitary salad buffet and other tasteless wastes
  • Caters to the downtown stressed and depressed, black powered-suited, environmentally careless cloned 'workers'
  • The so-called fresh salad offerings are limp and tasteless but the biggest downfall of this boring place was the tall stacks of large plastic environmentally UNfriendly take out tray packs and plastic 'cutlery'.
  • Owners are clearly unconcerned about the wastes/throw outs going into our environment.
  • This is yet another establishment feeding Earth Mother a constant intravenous of embalming chemicals.
  • Regretfully, power-suited clones support these tasteless, cheap joints because it reflects their trashy lifestyle and attitudes....a rush-more, eat-me-dump-me society.
  • I will not patronize and support, nor will I recommend a business that blatantly disregards the concept of recycling and Mother Earth just to make a buck. In fact, just walking in there and seeing the promotion of plastic made me lose my appetite.
  • This 'loop' will not be a part of my frequent eating establishments!

Friday, September 4, 2009

Things/Behaviour NOT to Do In Public- Four

Things/Behaviour NOT to Do In Public- Three

  • Men, keep your shirts on! I don't want to see your hairy chests or nipples or fat guts or your 'six-pack'. Have the decency and respect for women who are legally labelled 'indecent' if they went topless.
  • When communicating and especially when doing any business transaction [i.e. exchange of money] get off your cell phone, remove head/earphones and remove sunglasses. If you are sharing a meal, beverage or communicating with friend, family, co-worker, acquaintance etc, stay off your cell phone! Do I also have to mention not to talk so loudly on your phone while on buses or other public places that someone else can hear your conversation? ...Not in theaters or restaurants or any other areas where other people are in close proximity and trying to enjoy their space without others intruding upon it.
  • When someone addresses you or when someone says 'hello' or asks you a question, have the decency to respond in a clear, respectful manner.
  • Do not walk in front of someone or cut them off. If it is unavoidable, say 'excuse me'.
  • When you have been invited to share an event with someone or if someone has been very kind to you, send them a 'thank you' card in the mail...not an email, not a Facebook message, not an email....but an actual card of thanks.
  • When shopping, do not walk in front of someone to retrieve those all so important material goods. Wait patiently until that person is finished shopping in that area and has moved down the aisle or further down the rack. Do not reach over their head to retrieve something off a higher shelf. I once had a frothing-mouthed shopper reach over my head in a flower/gift shop to grab a glass vase and when she turned it over to look for a price tag, all the water spilled out and on to my clothes. I guess I should be grateful it was just the water and not the vase hitting me on the head.
  • When entering someone's home, remove your street shoes.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Things/Behaviour NOT to Do In Public- Three

Things/Behaviour NOT to Do In Public- Two

  • Males, when entering a home, business/restaurant, please remove your hat especially before you sit down to dine.
  • Pajama bottoms, food & underarm stained t-shirts, track suits, bra-like tops, pants that hang and drag to the knees are unacceptable attire for public appearances. I often wonder how chafed these guys become from having their pants droop and fall off their behinds. They often display their unclean underwear; they even walk in a particular, sliding bow-legged way to avoid tripping and or having their pants fall completely to their knees. This is 'cool'? It is appalling.
  • Keep the toothpicks out of your mouth! If you must pick at your teeth and scrape off your enamel, excuse yourself and do it in the privacy of the restaurant washroom. Use proper dental floss when you get home. Just because they are there, does not mean you have to use them....fresh globs of gum often land on the sidewalks, it does not mean you pop it into your mouth. Check your teeth in the washroom, not at the table.
  • If you see someone pre-dispensing paper towel in a washroom, do not take that piece. Chances are they were not dispensing it for you! Respect the fact that a rare soul is actually washing their hands properly and they do not want to touch the paper towel dispenser or water taps or door knob after they have thoroughly washed their hands. Wait the two seconds and dispense your own towel.
  • Males and females entering a building, hold the door open and wait for those leaving the building to exit first. Out with the old, in with the new. Do hold the door open for people coming in behind you. Many doors are automatic and are instilling a sense of etiquette laziness, apparently. Always be aware of people close to you when exiting and entering buildings and extend the door holding gesture.
  • If you are thanked, do not respond with a 'no problem' or other slang commentary. A simple 'you are welcome' will suffice in all situations.
  • If you are wishing a person a 'good day', say it! The most annoying thing is to hear expressions like, 'have a good one'....I often respond by asking, 'A good what?'.
  • It is poor manners to spit, hack & cough without covering your nose/mouth, littering cigarette ends, littering gum, dislodging nose contents without a tissue, scratching or yanking in your crotch area, digging in your ears, picking your nose, belching, etc while in public. You'd think these would be 'no brainers' but they are not. I witness them constantly.
  • If you are walking, keep to the right always. If you are in a group and other walkers are approaching, move into a single file to let them pass. I am often pushed or forced to walk off the side walk (and into the street) and swiped with bags or purses because people have not moved aside on the sidewalk.
  • Pedestrians have the right of way! This means that if there is a crosswalk and especially if they have the cross light, before turning your killcar, you MUST wait until all walkers have completely cleared the crosswalk before proceeding. If you are driving in two or more lane streets and you see vehicles slowing down, maybe take a logical second and take your foot off the gas pedal or maybe even put your foot on your brake...just maybe traffic is slowing for a reason; maybe there is a pedestrian walking across the crosswalk!! Come to a complete STOP, don't glide your vehicle through.

Friday, July 31, 2009

Things/Behaviour NOT to Do In Public- Two

Napkins and Serviettes
  • What is the use of a napkin or serviette?
  • Surprisingly, many of you do not know that this small table linen (or paper made) should always be placed to the right of the place setting. When food has been placed at the table and before starting to eat, males and females are to place the serviette on their lap
  • Always use a napkin or serviette, not your arm or clothing sleeve! As you use your napkin, do not keep replacing it to the top of your dining table. Do you realize how unsanitary and terribly unaesthetic said napkin looks after several food/mouth swipes? Place the napkin on your lap and return it after each wipe. Do not use the napkin to wipe or swipe as if you are drying with a bath towel or washing a baby's bottom, rather use discrete dabs to both corners of your mouth.
  • A napkin is also meant to protect your clothing from those embarrassing drips and stains that map your trips and contents at the trough
  • Napkins are definitely NOT used for blowing your nose or cleaning ears at the table or wiping perspiration from your forehead or neck! Do these in the washroom.
  • After everyone in your company has finished dining, then you may gently place the napkin on top of your plate.
  • If you accidentally drop your napkin, have the server replace it with a clean one.
  • If you are walking by a table and you want to catch the attention of someone, purposely yet discretely drop your napkin beside their table and have them pick it up for you while maintaining eye contact and thanking them.

Things/Behaviour NOT to Do In Public- One

Applying Make-up In Public

  • Do not apply mascara/make up/lipstick or brush your hair in public, especially while seated at a restaurant table or seated at the theatre or on public transportation. This behaviour is improper and rude and unsanitary.
  • Excuse yourself from the dining table and apply lipstick or mascara or brush hair in a washroom or powder room.
  • I once had a municipal government level manager invite me to lunch on the last day of my work contract. I had not quite finished eating the unflavorable food, when she whips out her compact and twists her lipstick out until a brightly coloured phallic rod is exposed and pressed to her eager lips. It is while she is looking in her mirror and fellatio impaling her coloured stick (and without even looking at me) that she mumbles an insincere 'thank you for your work'.

High Heeled Shoes and Foot Etiquette

High-Heeled Shoes

  • Because approximately 85% of women do not know how to properly walk in a heel, there is a high probability this directly concerns you!
  • Because higher heeled shoes cause structural/skeletal, as well as comical callous, why wear them?
  • NEWS: A woman toe-tripping/tipping and bow legging, slouched over in ill-fitting shoes is NOT sexy or attractive...AND it takes you longer to get to your destination, Ms. I-Think-I-Am-In-More-Control-And-I-Think-I-Have-More-Power-Than-I-Actually-Have PowerSuitically impaired cow!
  • If you look (AND YOU DO!) so awkwardly uncomfortable and hideously, insidiously comic, WHY do you insist on wearing them?
  • You are slouched and bowed over as if you are scanning for that lost penny on the side walk. You often have legs that are set too far apart, not in proportion to your hips or feet or dangle at odd angles. Picture following behind a bovine in shoes.
  • You often are rolling and so dangerously pronating that I want to run up behind you and scoop you into a wheelchair...because that is where you could end up from the damage you are doing to your body and the damage to social/fashion aestheticism. You must wear out your shoes quickly with the wear and 'tears'.
(Pronation is a turning outward of the foot at the ankle, so that one has a tendency to walk on the inner border of the foot. When a foot and ankle pronates to a great degree, it is referred to as over-pronation.)

  • Click clack to the nearest shoe store that has knowledgeable staff (good luck who can properly size/measure and fit your shoe. Also, they must sell only well-made footware preferably with good support and breathable material (yes, made from leather).
  • Sandals look great with dresses and skirts and are cooler in the summer although they are equally hard on your body. I see many people walking with their heels actually slipping away from the sandal and touching the ground. Try getting at least a sandal that straps in the ankle to help hold the heel in place.... at least a little.
  • NEWS: If the skin on your feet/heels is so cracked and damaged and fungalized that it looks like you soaked in acid, cover those things up! It makes me nearly nauseous. If you have foot odor and your feet are not confined in a covered shoe (if you want to wear sandals), tend to your problem. No one wants to smell your odoriferous feet! Foot odor can be easily controlled by simple washing, powdering and seeking medical advice about any fungus or bacteria that could be lurking and causing that stink. Inexpensive care and creams are available. Take care of your feet by washing them, cutting nails properly, massaging and applying moisturizer. They are the least expensive, under utilized form of 'green travel' and exercise.